Affluent Savvy
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Is not replying to a text ghosting?

Ghosting is when someone stops responding to messages and disappears from a relationship without explanation, usually in the context of dating.

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The phenomenon of ghosting has likely been around since the dawn of time. Consider the cavewomen who had to start getting choosy with their sexual partners because they didn't want to birth a child with someone who could disappear without a trace shortly thereafter, or the lovelorn man in Colonial times pouring his heart out in handwritten letters to some distant lover, only to never hear back. Many a '90s rom-com, too, featured a despondent leading lady hovering over a landline telephone for days on end, waiting hopelessly for the guy who took her out a few days ago to call her up and ask her out again. (He often never did.) While the behavior itself isn't new, the term "ghosting" itself rose to popularity in the early 2010s. In 2015, after online tabloids ran headlines about how Charlize Theron "ghosted" Sean Penn, the New York Times even wrote an explainer on the term, calling it "the ultimate silent treatment." Merriam-Webster added it to the dictionary in 2017. It makes sense that ghosting would get a lot of people talking around this time: With technology rapidly transforming the speed and ease with which people could communicate with one another, ghosting behavior likely felt even more pronounced than ever. While mailing a letter just to reject someone may have been legitimately too much time and effort back in the day, the fact that people were still disappearing on each other without a trace even now that a kinder closure was literally just a few quick button taps away...harsh! Dating apps were also just beginning to enter into the cultural mainstream, with Tinder launching in 2012. (Though to be fair, what's often thought of as the world's first online dating site, Match.com, launched in 1995, and we can only imagine people ghosted one another as much then as they do on today's best dating apps.) In a world where it can feel like you have nearly endless potential people to chat with, it's become easier than ever to start talking to someone regardless of whether you're actually interested in continuing the conversation with them over time. People start to feel like just pictures on your screen rather than real-life humans whose feelings you have to care about. And more starts with less follow-through (and less care) unfortunately means more ghosting.

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How do guys show they like you?

He leans toward you during conversation. People tend to naturally lean toward people they like in conversation, according to Battle. If the guy you like tends to lean his face in closer to yours while he's talking to you or listening to you talk, that's a good sign that he might be into you.

Here's the thing about trying to know if a guy likes you: Sometimes looking for small signs is never going to give you an accurate full picture of what's going on. Some guys will do all of the above with their friends, while other guys will like someone but not do any of the above. "Some folks may be less able to express their attractions as overtly as this," Battle says. "For instance, my shy clients sometimes struggle with externalizing their feelings for a crush even in subtle ways. That means that even though they like someone, it might be harder for the other person to tell. When in doubt, talk about it!" If you're not sure if a guy likes you but is hiding it, just ask him and let him tell you directly how he feels. It sounds scary, but it definitely doesn't have to be! A simple "Hey, I think you're really cool, and I'm kind of into you—are you into me?" is casual, direct, a little sexy, and also nonthreatening. If it's a no, at least you know! And if it's a yes, now the fun stuff begins.

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