Photo: Maria Orlova

How do you attract a relationship?

Part 1: 8 Habits to help you attract any partner Be your authentic self everywhere you go including on social media. ... Do the things you love. ... Bring to life your definition of beauty. ... Give genuine compliments generously. ... Keep your mind open. ... Be present. ... Invest in yourself. ... Focusing on adding value to others.

lovefulmind.com - 15 Habits That Will Help You Attract The Right Partner Into Your Life

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Part 1: 8 Habits to help you attract any partner

Be your authentic self everywhere you go including on social media

There are people who might not be your romantic type but you can’t help but feel drawn to them. There’s something about them that’s so interesting and magnetic. That something keeps showing up whether you approve of it or not. It makes you feel good to be in their presence. Well, it’s their authenticity. Authenticity shines. It breeds trust and meaningful connections. And what’s more, when you’re true to yourself and honestly communicate your values to the world, people will be able to self-select themselves before you even have to. You will be more attractive to the people who are similar to you; as for those who don’t have the same values as you, they will respect you. It’s also beneficial to present your authentic self on social media as that’s where you’re most seen nowadays. If you use online dating, being authentic will help weed out the incompatible partners early on.

Do the things you love

When it comes to romantic love, nothing is more repulsive than a person who doesn’t have any life or hates their life so much that they latch onto others to escape themselves — That person shouldn’t be dating; they need professional help (like myself in the past). If you want to have a good relationship with a great partner, the secret is to have a good relationship with yourself and your own life first.

Doing the things you love is beneficial in many ways:

It makes you happier, It’s taking the step to build a life you love, It makes you more confident and therefore more attractive, It brings you to the people who love the same things as you do, and It allows you to create meaningful connections with these people.

Bring to life your definition of beauty

Look matters — let’s settle that one first. It’s human nature to be drawn to people who’re healthy looking and present themselves well. But I can’t say the same about beauty standards. Beauty standards are made up by the media (and basically strangers who have nothing to do with you). They simply don’t work for everyone. You don’t need to look like a Victoria Secret’s angel to be attractive and find a good partner. You only need to look your best and your best is whatever it is that makes you feel most loved, most confident, most authentic. When you daringly define your own beauty standard and put effort into upholding it for yourself, your confidence and vitality will glow up like nothing else.

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Give genuine compliments generously

Being charming is attractive. One simple way to increase your charm and make people want to be around you more is giving genuine compliments and being generous with your compliments. First, it’s positive for everyone involved and it’s a good way to reinforce your confidence. Secondly, it requires you to see the good in others. When you don’t only see but also vocally appreciate the good in people, they will likely want to bring out that good side of them when they’re with you and recognise the good in you too. This helps perpetuate a loving, accepting, nourishing environment for your relationship together — romantic or not. It also makes it easy for you to flirt in a genuine, playful way if you do happen to have a romantic interest in them.

Keep your mind open

When you’re out and about meeting new people, keeping your mind open is very important in building connections and creating attraction. If you have set ideas of how things are and use them to judge others right off the bat, you have robbed yourself off of the opportunities to gain new perspectives that can enrich your life. Being closed-minded is also egocentric. It’s negative for everyone involved. It ends the conversion before one can even begin. The best way to approach a new connection is that you let it unfold naturally. By all means please do keep your dating goals in mind, but the getting-to-know-each-other process should stay the same regardless of anyone’s agenda: You listen without judgment or jumping to conclusions; you gather information over time and, after a decent amount of time, you decide whether this connection meets your expectations or not. If not, you let it be what it is. If anything, you might’ve just got yourself a new good friend who can introduce you to someone who is a more suitable partner for you.

Be present

People often say they like someone who is spontaneous. The dictionary definition of this is “performed or occurring as a result of a sudden impulse or inclination and without premeditation or external stimulus.” Interestingly, from my personal experiences, most people prefer planning and what they actually mean by “spontaneous” is the ability to be in the moment. It’s what makes an interaction light, playful, carefree, and full of joy.

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When you’re with someone, give them your full attention. Show your authentic self and give them genuine compliments while making smiling eye contact with them. If they don’t fall for you, they will most likely develop a crush on you.

Invest in yourself

This is a quote that I always remember: “People don’t love you for the emotional energy you put in the relationship; they love you for who you are.” At the end of the day, it’s about you. Putting effort into yourself will always pay off. It’s the best investment you could ever make. It signals to others that you value yourself and you’re indeed very valuable. It elicits desire from others to be like you, wanted by you, and be with you. But this isn’t just about being attractive to other people. You should invest in yourself whether you’re in a relationship or not — your education, your career, your well-being, going to the gym, attending therapy, etc. When life turns south unexpectedly, all the work you’ve put in yourself will be there to save you and help you start over again. You’ll be glad and you’ll be proud.

Focusing on adding value to others

When you meet new people, having a clear dating goal (which you 100% should) can easily make you come across as “pushing for an agenda” and you suddenly have certain expectations that the fragility of a new connection cannot handle. One way to avoid this pitfall is to focus on adding value to others. When you add value to others — be it being helpful to them in any way or simply having genuine fun together, they will like you more and the interaction will become more natural. You’ll also get more positivity out of the relationship instead of feeling the stress of not knowing whether it will meet your goal and eventually becoming resentful. After all, all the time spent has been spent; with this approach, at least you know it was well-spent.

lovefulmind.com - 15 Habits That Will Help You Attract The Right Partner Into Your Life

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